Self Pity, Self Indulgence

A friend once told me that self pity is bad, very bad. I add self indulgence to the same category. But then for any south asian fed on movies and regional myths, it's difficult not to be melodramatic in thinking and action.
We feel bad about "accidents". We just don't do anything about them. We keep remembering the lost loves. We don't want to look at our mistakes. We keep thinking about "What might have been?". .....
What happens when you stop being a typical South Asian. No self pity, no self indulgence, no unnecessary emotion (necessary emotion might as well be oxymoron),..
Life will be as bland as it can be. But then it's your choice. Do you want an interesting bumpy ride in life or you want to sleep walk through life?