A Normal Life.

I was readhing about Genghis Khan a while ago. It seems 0.5% (1/200) of world's population carry his genes. Yuck, I hope I don't.:) I don't want to get my genese tested.
Coming back to my "normal life" story. He had an unusual life. So did Gandhi, Napolean, Hitler, Lenin, Bhutto, Indira, Kennedy, Che, Naxal leaders, theives, rapists,...
We are no where near like them. I am talking about silent, useless majority like me. :)
What do normal lives look like? We study, get a degree, obedient towards parents, marry within community, land in a white collar job, lose hair, watch junk movies, (or browse junk websites these days), have kids, worry about their education, curse govt and do nothing about it, lose mass every single day of life after 25 yrs, get religious as you age (if you weren't already), dream like a zillion others did,crave for brands, boast about HP of your car, brandish your academic achievements, seek stupid fame,...
Is this what life is about? I don't want to lead such a life. I want an emergency exit. I must start off the blocks soon or I will remain where I am.

Update.

I was lazy, I was depressed, I had work, I wasn't interested,..Or any combination of these factors. :) For lack of updates. I am cheerful again.

Sorry.

About updates. It's going to be another busy week for me. Will update tomorrow.

Google.

Somebody lands on my blog by searching for

"Where we can find call girs in bangalore"

Good that, he is searching for girs instead of girls. And lucky me , if you search for call girls in Bangalore, my blog isn't in search results. Atleast till now. All that will change now. ;) :(

Chess

I learnt chess at a relatively young age. I had misconceptions about myself to be a good player. Guess I was. If you don't take my haste into consideration. With delusions of being a rapid good player, I often lost in hands of some friends. If I took my time, I often won over them.
But when it mattered most, like in tournaments, I lost. :(
While in college, I was playing this girl who was super slow. And here I was, being an exhibitionist (that's for some other time) I was taking a walk (literally) while she was contemplating my destruction. On mis-step, and I was staring into defeat. And I lost.
How I regret to this day? She will be boasting about either her chess skills or lampooning lack of mine. ;)
Did I tell you people my son is a good chess player, like me, that is. ;) :(
He learnt at a vry young age. 3.5 yrs. About 2 yrs ago , that is. He has brains, but not enough concentration. He participated in a tournament and even won a round. Suddenly one fine day, he says "I am bored of chess". There goes crashing my dreams of having a world champion in house. :)
To while away my time, I used to play chess on computer. (Chessmaster 9000) I guess my ranking was somewhere around 1600. I stopped playing on computer a while ago. I restarted a couple of days ago. My score stands at 1400+. Hopefully I will reach atleast 1800 in a month's time.
Wish me good luck.

Anger.

Anger is proportional to weakness. I guess, I was always more than normal "angry" person. I don't remember well how I acted when I was kid, I mean when I used to be angry.
When some other kid bullies you and you are not strong enough to respond. You feel wretched and angry. If given a chance, probably you will hit back.
But then you cannot correct every mistake. You feel helpless and angry. It consumes you. It is said that nobody is born evil. How does it matter when somebody is evil now?
We can maintain our distance from evil. That's escapism. When lies are told, rihts are trampled, dignity is at stake, you fight back. But be assured, this is a losing battle. We are born to crush each others' spirit.
There are couple of incidents (or more) when I got physical when I was angry. Naturally it landed me in further complications. Being verbal in your frustration too almost always lands you in issues. Guess that doesn't stop me at times. :( :)
I believe in being proactive & reactive. There is no fun in being passive. There is only one life and I will not lead that like an anonymous insect. I will continue to make mistakes, regret and relish. :)
Stupid post, I know. Before anybody points that out.

Lust.

I am not going to talk (much) about girls. :) It's about my lust for all things in general. All my friends know me as compulsive shopper. Let me go back in tim and try to remember what all things I had lusted after.
I wanted Batteries.
I wanted Magnets.
I wanted money.
I wanted coll drinks.
I wanted Cadbury 5 star.

.......***********&77^^^^^^^^^^^^^%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%*&&((((((@#$%
I lost interest in this post. Some other time. Sorry about that.

Lifted frm another blog.

"i wonder if i will long for you
all my life."

http://gorpy.blogspot.com/
Very interesting blog.

Life is Good.

I guess some people feel, they should have been born a few yrs later. I feel so at times. I want to be more young, probably a teen now. ;) Think about other side of coin. There is no time like this.
I will talk about my reasons for this time being the best time to be in.

1)Internet. Though I would have liked more speeds, I am happy that, Internet had enriched and corrupted me at right times. :)

2)DVD. Better than tapes. Piracy, ease of use and all. Better than Blue Ray and HD-DVD. Too pricey and probably diffiult to copy. :)

3)Satellite Television. No need of explanation. I just hope it remains within reach of everybody. Capitalism will ensure that.

4)Books. Hardbound, softcover, leatherbound, Xeroxed copies, multicolour, ebooks, ...What more one can ask for.

5)Cheap Toys. Bless china, Bless plastics, Bless micromotors, microcontrollers,...
Can afford as many toys as kids want.

6)Cheap textiles. No explanation needed.

7)Reasonable Oil Prices, Reasonable world order, Relative peace among nations, cultures, religions.

8)Cheap electronics, consoles, games,....;)

................
................

Don't you people agree we are living in best of times. How did all this start? My 5yr old son like Pink Panther Cartoon series a lot. I wanted to buy as many episodes of that series as possible. I find that a 5 disc DVD edition containing 126 episodes is available at less than 50$. :) And then I realised how good life was.:)

Badminton.

After a yr or so, I played badminton again. I am sure I am not going to continue long, even this time. I will invent some knee pain, if it isn't there and stop playing again. :(
My weight is well within limits. Muscle mass isn't. :(

Movies.

I have this secret desire to make movies. Ofcourse, I want to have my own stories and screenplays. I recently even bought a book about movie making. It seems my dad too had a similar desire. :) It's just that he had no resources.
With costs coming down and technology being what it is, it should be many magnitudes less work then what it used to be till a while ago.
Ok, friends, I am looking for a HD camera. ;)
I hope to make a film soon. Before I get old and I forget all my impulses. I am running out of time. I want to make a film with my son. I want to make horror films (Subtle ones), those french kind of movies.
I just need to find some time for all this. Hopefully, before the end of year, I will have time.
Ok,friends, don't imagine me to be a jerk. I might be, just don't call me one.

Escapist.

I am a big, big escapist. A confession follows. Once I bought a comics book from a rental library when I was kid. (~12 yrs). Daily rental was some 50 Ps or so. I someho missed returning that within 2 days. And I had only 1 rupee for my discretionary spending. I don't remember why I didn't ask my parents, since they were very liberal with me in all respects.
And instead of returning the book on 3 rd day or so, I simply kept delaying the issue. Finally the shop keeper had come to my home, looking for his book and the kid who took it. All along I knew that, it's going to happen. Then why didn't I act? I was just wishing away the problem. :( That good guy had asked for 3rs or so instead of 7 or 8 rs I owe if it had been calculated normally.

Why did I remember that now? I hate my mobile phone. And I hate more all those guys whe get hold of my number.I don't want to talk to any relative stranger. Please, please call me only when your job cannot be done by somebody else.
There is this guy, a supplier who insists on meeting me, talking to me for atleast 30 mts,..It's actually like stalking. He wants to know my programme for next 2 months. He wants to know if he can meet me in delhi, ....
God bless the guy who invented caller ID. The moment I see such stalkers' name appearing on my mobile/landline, I am into escapist mode. I simply let my mobile divert call to somebody else and landline to just ring, ring and ring. I know that, at times, the other party knows that, I am avoiding him. Even then, some persist. I hate all such people.
I consider myself to be a sensitive , nice person. Surprise, Surprise.:) And I end up saying "yes" when I want to say "no". And some people take advantage of that. That's the reason I avoid talking. Talking to people outsie my circle.
It's not that whole world conspired to take advantage of me. It's just that, I am not very right in all imy interactions with people around me. And hence I avoid, try to escape.
The whole thing sounds like nonsense. I know.

Cartoons, Beer, Deaths & Steel.

My opinion on each of the goes like this.

Cartoons. One question I ask is why are Hindu gods and Moslem Prophets a target for western guys. Hinuds , ofcourse being a docile lot don't react much even when images of their gods appear on beer bottles, underwear, slippers and what not. Muslims are different. People talk about intolerance in madrassas, then what is this? When you know the other guy is irritable, why do something that irritates him.
Coming to protests, what's the point buring our own cars, pelting at our own police and making a mockery of ourselves.
Who's dying? not the cartoonists. Who's property is being destroyed? Not the danish. It's stupidty like this which makes west think that we are idiots who can't do much.

Steel. If Mittals bid is rejected, my hatred for european countries will increase.

Google Chat Rocks.

Though I installed Google Talk, I never used that. All those guys with too much of time on hadn must be knowing that Google had integrated chat into their mail.
I was chatting with a friend today and it really is cool. Don't ask me what's dfferent. Chats are saved, there is no another application to start, no extra features ad hopefully "get update" buttons.
That's it. If somebody wants to chat with me, try google chat. But I never gave you my google ID, right? ;)

Pulmonary Hypertension.

Does that sound serious enough? Going by google results it is. And my son is diagnosed with that. He is responding well to the treatment. It's going to be long. But as long as we are on right track, we don't mind duration of treatment.
That was mentioned for record sake.
Otherwise everything is fine.

After a while.

I am in hyderabad. I forgot my laptop power adapter in Delhi. So typing from some other computer. Hopefully no keylogger is installed. I don't want my secrets to end up in hands of CIA, Iran Revolutionary guards and all. :)
Kid is slightly better. Medical science isn't anywhere near perfect. Diagnosis is a matter of trial and error. And intrepretation is more so. Hopefully his suffering will lessen soon.
Since long I was talking aboutr becoming rich. I can see that happening in 2006. That is no invitation for anybody to ask me a loan. :) It's I who beg for new gadgets all the time. :)
Took kids to a water front restaurant. Location, Necklace Road, Hussain Sagar, Hyderabad. They had fun with toy train, ride on speed boat(actually scared),...
What else I wanted to write about? These days I am sleeping early. After 15 yrs or so. Hope to continue this way.
Chalo, will post more tomorrow. And don't take comments about my getting rich seriously. ;)

Books I have bought today.

The Bear Trap Afghanistan's untold story.
The ISI connection.
Profiles Of Intelligence by Brigadier Syed A.I. Tirmazi (pakistan)
Bangladesh The next Afghanistan?
Fulcrum of Evil ISI-CIA-Al Qaeda Nexus

Now that shows my inclination towards particualr subjects. Right?

Update.

I have been making rounds of hospitals today. For my son. Guess, this will be routine for another few days. Otherwise things are fine. Whatever that means.

To city and then Capital.

I am travelling from my village/town to Hyderabad tomorrow and then either to Chennai/ Delhi the day after.
Kids are super excited about shopping oppurtunities. Bu their shopping god, their dad will not be with them for more than 1 day. :( I was gently warned not to pamper them anymore. But then, how can I stop myself from buying them pink panther, power rangers, tom &jerry, train models, video games, movies,....:) And then a few for myself.
Chalo, later then. Did I tell you people , I can have lunch/ dinner with federal ministers and some of richest people in India over next 4 days if I want to? :) But then I don't want to. I am happy with my jaunts to palika bazaar, metro station and all instead of dinners where I am expected to be in formal dress.
F*** all of you tie & suit guys.

2 Confessions.

I was an occasional crook when I was kid. A full time crook now. ;) Kidding apart, I can remember few occasions where I sweet talked/ cheated innocent classmates into something I wanted. 2 such instances follow.

1) There was this girl hassena, tall, fair, nice and stupid girl. Once we were asked by our teacher to collect stamps. Philately. I collected a few, variety based on price. Previously mentioned girl had a great collection. Based on age, country... She had stamps from 1954,.. My evil eye had been cast. I asked her to lend me her collection for a day to better appreciate that. Unaware of my evil design, she had given me that.
:)
And what did I do the night I had her collection? I lifted few stamps. And she didn' even realise that, the next day. Ofcourse I took care not to include those stolen stamps in my collection. I wanted them for future use.
I don't remember whether I had any compunction.
Epilogue. My stamp collection too got stolen by somebody else after a while. Whole collection. :( Sorry Haseena.

2) A classmate of mine had few old coins. Coins dating from 1930s. I wanted them. Beg, Borrow or Steal. I didn't do any of these things. I went for barter. What had I to offer? Shiny new 25 ps coins introduced by govt. Since they were jut introduced, no of coins in circulation was low. That fellow craved for those coins, foolishly. I gave them and recieved those old coins. Does anyone remember aladdin's lamp being bartered for new shiny useless lamp. :) Sorry Brahmachari.(Classmate's name)

Epilogue: I still have them, somewhere. But I refuse to look at those sins. Before anybody equates me to museum thieves, those coins aren't that priceless. I know I did a mistake, but didn't loot anybody out of his wealth. ;)

That's it for today.

Sorry.

I am in no mood to post here. Sorry about that. Reason, too many loose ends on my side. Let things fall in place, I will be back with enough enthusiasm.
Later.

A life less ordinary.

Say you start with 10$. You win a lottery of 100$. You are happy. Bu you are supposed to fill many forms and all. You have no problem doing all that imagining that 100$. And when you did all that, you get only 50 $ because other 50$ must go to taxes. How do you feel? Bad?
Why don't you remember that it was a lottery?
Though lot of rich people claim that, the money they have is hard earned money. It never is beyond , a limit. It is just brokerage money every rich person has. For being able to manage some people, some resources and filling some needs.
The whole thing sounds nonsensical. I know. :)